Figure out what your feelings are
I repeat, you are NOT going crazy. Their time moves at a completely different pace than ours. Nothing distracts you from it. Good morning. After a breakup, your ex becomes the default setting that you mentally and emotionally go to no matter what happens.
Is there really a way to deprogram “i can’t stop thinking about my ex” mode?
Everyone you meet is a highlighter they do nothing more than highlight the absence of your exand it sucks. There are no erasers in sight.
It was nothing even close to factual and heavily convoluted by the fog of my desperation and nonexistent self-esteem. This is why when we reach authentic indifference, many exes come shamelessly or passivelycome crawling back. Energy always transcends conventional communication because energy is our only way of truly communicating.
It was bad. And I was okay with it. My addiction was gone and I was finally clean.
Obsessed with your ex? it's not just you…
Denial is a dangerous place to reside and it goes hand-in-hand with delusion. Pain is pain and trauma is trauma. The points above did not immediately rid me of my ex addiction but they ificantly increased my ability to bounce back and ultimately, become indifferent. Make the decision with me now to stop putting your life on hold over the hope that one day the cat will bark. Cats meow.
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Poke a hole in your imagination boat, take him off that pedestal, retire your role as the doormat, and feel every ounce of your pain because it is yours and it WILL eventually pass. You are not alone. Sometimes all it takes is just for one person to believe in us. Do you want to get clean fast? This is why they say recovery from addiction is a decision away. Great great post! I have such a vivid imagination. In fact, as being that I was the only child I made pretend that my stuffed animals and my dolls were my friends and I would have full length conversations with them. No different from now, I tend to still imagine what this person who meant so much to me could have contributed to my life.
Minus the array of problems, but only the good. Knowing damn for well that the problems trumps the good, but I pictured the opposite. I miss this person so much.
I dreamt last night they texted me. I want them to need me like I needed them. I want to be made aware of these things, I want to take the power back. I think I would feel so much better. I am crying.
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Thank you. For writing, for sharing, for being exactly what I needed in this very moment. I will write more later. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. I printed this out and will be reading it every day. God bless you Natasha. GIRL, you have a gift. I related to every sentence of this. OH and I just bought that bomber. I have read a large amount of articles, and this one is by far the most reassuring and helpful one. I just wanted him to perfect and so I kept the relationship going and fell in love with what I was imagining. In reality he is an addicted, emotionally unavailable piece of shit who made me sad all the time.
Thank you so much Sarah — for taking the time to share, for being a part of this tribe, and for being such an inspiration.
The process of working yourself through a breakup is much like losing someone
First of allyou look badass in that bomber jacket! And yasssssss! I thought I was going crazy. Hi Diane!
Thanks for the encouragement. Still going strong. It is the stupid obsessed thoughts and over analyzing that causes me to be sad and anti social sometimes. Ughhh I hate thinking about my ex wondering what is going on in their head. So effing annoying! Just the answers and figuring out and estimations and assumptions that run through my mind. My ex is the last thing on my mind at night and the first thing I think of when I wake up.
In fact my ex probably sleeps great, eats great, laughs and is enjoying life. My ex got a distraction possible rebound so that explains why. Breaks my heart, but like I said, the NC part is easy.
Why can’t i stop thinking about my ex?
Thanks Diane and stay strong, we are in this together, all of these lovely ladies. We have more to look forward to that worry about this ex drama. Perfect timing! My heart is beginning to heal. My emotions are starting to settle.
My self esteem is building. I always love hearing from you. BIG hug back to you! Funny tonight I should read this because I soooo needed to read this as I wiped my tears away. I left him 5 months ago because I realized just how much he had triggered my past traumas. I did no contact for 40days, then texted him, got apologies but nothing more so I wrote him a letter explaining my crap…crickets for 2 months. I cried and cried then I stopped and realized he was just a projection of what I thought he was…I was wrong and I had to accept that he was just another emotionally unavailable man I was so used to.
I let him go. So I blocked him. Thank you Natasha so much!
You have helped me more then you could even imagine…in some way saved me from me…my baggage came heavy but I am surviving and thank god smiling!!! Thank you so much Tan. Keep coming back here to the blog.
I cant stop thinking that I must have done something to cause that to happen but at the same time a part of me has to admit that the potential for this had to pre-exist at least a little bit. We havent been in touch at all for almost 2 months but i still think about him constantly and dream of him often.
Do I just give myself more time to heal? Hi Sasha!
How to stop thinking about an ex? here’s what you need to do:
I know how hard it is and how much it hurts. Give yourself time to heal and keep coming back here to the blog xoxo. Hi Sasha, I feel the same way, except mine has been 2 years post break up. me at bijangirl yahoo. I love this blog!
He future faked me, used me and lied to get what he wanted. I hope he regrets losing me. Hi Heather! You are never alone. Thank you so much for sharing. What a freak and I am forever scarred from this android thank you for reading.
This is after he split up with me and three weeks later took a new girl to Paris. What is with all this BS? But it is still so painful.